“You’re gonna Photoshop that, right?”
.jpg)
I hear it way to often. From moms and dads. From brides and grooms and sometimes, sadly, from children. I usually laugh along when it’s said, because I have also had those moments, but every time someone asks me to “make them skinny” or “can you make my teeth white?” It makes a little knot form in my stomach.
The goal of my photography business isn’t to make you flawless, it’s to document the love and joy that’s happening right in front of you. The love that you are SO. FORTUNATE. to have. It makes my little photographer heart so sad when you can’t see the love that is surrounding you because you’re stressed that you still haven’t lost that baby weight. What makes an image beautiful to me is not perfect skin and white teeth. It’s joy radiating from people’s hearts.
Beauty is your 80-year-old grandmother crying tears of happiness as you walk down the aisle. It’s your mascara running because you have actually laughed until you cried. It’s the couple that is so wrapped up in each other on their wedding day that they forget I’m even photographing them.
Beauty is the mom who is willing to lie in the grass for tickle fights because these moments are worth more than the price she paid for these pictures. It’s the dad who dressed up in the outfit his wife picked and happily smiles for the family photographs because he knows these images are something his wife will cherish.
I photographed a family that looked like models. Like they just walked out of the J.Crew catalog. Trained smiles. The session took all of 30 minutes. At the end of the session the little girl was twirling in her dress smiling. The mom was trying to grab her and put her in the car. The little girl fell over in the dirt – and the mom yelled at her. The dress was “ruined.” “Why can’t you just listen to me…” The girl was very obviously crushed. The mom went on to tell me that she hates talking family photos because her daughter’s smile is “so fake.” Her daughter was 4. The photos may turn out gorgeous, but at that moment that mama had an ugly heart.
I got in my car and drove away.
I thought of all the families I’ve photographed where mom was a little heavy or dad had gained a few. Where the bride was so painfully self-conscious about what she looked like in that dress. The groom that was embarrassed that his teeth were not straight. The mother of the bride that didn’t want to be in photos because she was “too big.” I wished I had told them all what I’m telling you.
One day someone will cherish this photograph. They will look at that moment with you in it and it will bring a smile to their face or maybe a tear to their eye. That alone makes you beautiful.
The love that is so obviously written on your faces for your loved ones – not a gorgeous trained smile – is what I want to capture.
Stop fussing about wrinkles and gray hairs. Who cares if you have 15 pounds to lose. You will never have that moment again with your loved ones so BE PRESENT in the moment.
Dad, hold your wife tight like this may be the last photograph you ever have. Moms, throw your head back and laugh at the crazy-ridiculous faces your kids are making -stop worrying about what your chin looks like. Smile until your eyes crinkle. Laugh until you are out of breath and your stomach hurts.
Life is too short to worry about looking beautiful. Beauty really does come from the inside.
It comes from a thankful heart.
